


Shipping Wars

by using_this_name



Series: Crackity Crack [86]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Crack, Drabble, F/M, Humor, M/M, Multiple Pairings, Other, Shipping
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-21
Updated: 2014-02-21
Packaged: 2018-01-13 07:25:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 387
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1217581
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/using_this_name/pseuds/using_this_name
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Keep Calm and Shipping Wars are Dumb</p>
            </blockquote>





	Shipping Wars

  
**Scott:** Stydia!  


**Isaac:** Sterek!

**Scott:** STYDIA!

**Isaac:** STEREK!

**Peter:** STETER!

**Scott:**  Go away Peter.

**Isaac:** Yeah.  You’re super creepy.  Also.  STEREK!

**Stiles:**  Um. What are you guys doing?

**Scott:**  Deciding who you should have sex with.

**Isaac:**  You should def have sex with Derek.  He’s all broody.

**Scott:** Derek is horrible. Please have sex with Lydia!

**Peter:** Or me.  You should have sex with me.  I’m very good at—

**Scott:** Please leave.

**Stiles:**  Well, the great thing about being officially bi now is…

**Isaac:**  SUCK IT STYDIA. STILES LIKES THE BOYS!

**Stiles: …** that I could be equally attracted to Derek or Lydia.  You do know what bi means, yeah?

**Peter:** What about—

**Stiles:** No offense, dude, but Steter is usually creepy non-con.  I don’t _have_ to be attracted to you.

**Peter:** Fair.  I’m switching my vote to Stydia. That girl has great skin.

**Isaac:**  Whatever. You know you’d rather lick Derek’s abs than—

**Scott:**  They are super nice abs. But have you seen Lydia? Plus. Sterek sucks.

**Stiles:** I feel like you shouldn’t be insulting ships that don’t affect you? I mean, you can all like what you like, and in the end, that will have absolutely no bearing on what _I_ like. You know?

**Isaac:**  As long as I can still fantasize about Sterek…

**Stiles:**  Of course! You can even come over for a threesome this weekend if you…

**Isaac:** Ha! I knew it! Sterek forever!

**Stiles:** …wait ‘til the afternoon. ‘Cause we’re doing kinky overnight things with Lydia on Friday.

**Isaac:**  Ah.

**Stiles:**  Now. I have a date with Danny in a few. You guys need me to stay here and help you figure out the whole Scallison/Allisaac/Scisaac/Scira thing or will you be ok?

**Scott:**  Nah. We’re good.

**Stiles:**  Just remember: Keep Calm and Shipping Wars are Dumb.

…

**Scott:**  So. Foursome?

**Isaac:**  I’m not gonna lie, it would solve a lot of problems.

**Scott:** We could call it Scallisaacira?

**Isaac:** Scallisiraac?

**Scott:**  Scirallisaac?

**Stiles:** I think we learned an important lesson about friendship and respecting people’s opinions today.  Now I’ma go have kinky sex with Danny. And maybe even you, Creepy Uncle Peter.  Who knows? The night is young.

**Peter:** Don’t keep me waiting too long.  I have a weakness for Pydia.

*Stiles leaves*

**Scott:** …Kiralliscaac?

**Isaac:** Oh! I like that one!

**Author's Note:**

> If you want updates as they happen, follow me on tumblr, where I am going by using-this-name (with dashes instead of underscores).
> 
> I would also LOVE any prompts that you would like to send me on tumblr. Any pairing, or any trope!


End file.
